Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Letting go...

Does anyone else find it as hard to let go as I do?

Listen to these expressions about letting go: “I was hanging onto it by my fingernails,” or “My knuckles almost turned blue I was holding on so tightly.” Why is that? When I tried to leave my office today, knowing I wouldn’t be back for three months, knowing I would be missing Christmas, the most exciting, super busy but fun time at The Salvation Army, I kept going back…and back…and back. Back to get some fresh flowers that might have a few more days life in them. Back to get the emergency backup jar of peanut butter in my desk drawer. Back to tell Lindsay some obscure detail of a project she might have to take care of.

“Take care of your health” was not a mantra I grew up with. More commonly I heard “Do your best.” And “Finish what you start.” And “You always need to help others.” And sometimes, I heard “It has to be perfect.” Although it wasn’t usually said out loud, I heard it anyway. Something about the way we grew up set up my sisters and me up for some struggles with perfectionism, which makes it harder to let go. I’m thankful my doctor stepped in and said the right thing: “You need to take some time to take care of yourself.” I just wish she hadn’t said it right before the Christmas season. But I’m learning from my young teammates and fellow bloggers. They would tell me to take a chill pill, and that’s exactly what I’m going to do. Do you have trouble letting go?  Or is it easy for you? Either way, I'd love to hear about it. Please put a sentence or two in Comments!